Here is a follow up from that teacher, our group member, who went through the rude boys thing last week:
“I did the thing I dreaded today – the conference with the kid and his dad. I was the only female in the room and that SUCKED, along with the principal and the assistant principal. Neither said much while this man berated me from across the table. He agreed with me that his sons behavior was inappropriate, but he felt there was no reason to have the “sexually harassed” part and there was no evidence to back it up. He said in a court of law it wouldn’t stand-up. I looked at him across the table and kept saying, “The point is, your son wasn’t doing what he was supposed to be doing.”. He agreed, but didn’t like the wording as part of his son’s record. Well, I didn’t tell the kid to do any of it, so it’s not me. The dad kept trying to infer that my class was out of control. Humm, funny the last two days have been wonderfully quite (quiet). Finally after almost an hour of being lectured at, the principal said he supports his teachers and the other guy in the room asked the boy if he felt comfortable returning to class.
“I wasn’t asked, no apology was offered and the kid is back in my room today right after the meeting. The only thing the kid said is sometimes I cry and nothing gets done, there isn’t any consistency to my teaching and the subject matter is random. Probably all true, but no apology. I should have walked out when the conversation went in circles.
“Well, if there is ANY more messing around I have the fathers permission to kick the kid out.”
My response: what the kid said is a mirror of what the father has imparted to him about teachers. It’s an American mindset, an attack on you when he is the one who’s behavior is being questioned. Certain political groups do that; they turn shit around on people. This dad must be a politician. His son will learn those skills and our society will suffer from it. Sorry about the soapbox on that. My point: what that kid said there, as if he were in a position to critique your work (NOT!), was a symptom of a very very sick society where children are allowed to say such things. Very sad to read that.
That you were not asked if YOU felt comfortable with his returning to YOUR classroom is another sign that these three men were on the roof level of the discussion house, and you and the kid, the woman and the child, were not up there with the three men, but in the basement. This is unpardonable. The behavior of the principals, the AP in particular, who asked if the kid was “ready to return to YOUR classroom” but who did not ask you, the teacher, the same question, is way beyond any pardon and indicative that those three guys made a little fraternity house right in that room. I don’t feel that I am reading too much into that, either.
I think you did great.It was a loss that the kid got back into class, but it was a big victory that one call from you and the kid is out. But it indicates why our system is failing so badly. Women in an inferior position to the men who run the school, and even the kid gets to blast the teacher in front of the principal. WTF? If I were in that room I would have STOPPED that kid from his description of your class. Can you say THROTTLED? I’m not interested in hearing what the kid has learned from his father about this class WITHOUT EVER HAVING BEEN IN IT but who nevertheless has taught his son what to think about it. This enables the son to not be a conscious member of the student group as the ACTFL modes and as the classroom rules request. The kid doesn’t have to show up! That’s what all of this is about. You ask him to become human and he doesn’t want to, he says those crude, awful things in class, and you basically get blamed. The father wants you to get more organized, maybe teach some grammar the way he learned it. The father has shown the son that it is YOUR problem.
When the boy said that you:
…nothing gets done, there isn’t any consistency to [your] teaching and the subject matter is random….
and you said that it is probably true, but maybe you could stop and look at that before you agree so fast. There is absolutely no consistency in my own teaching, and if we are doing the approach correctly, that is what it looks like, but it is the farthest thing from the truth. It’s just the way TPRS/CI rolls. It’s random. Small children do not have their language acquisition device activated by neatly arranged chapters in a book. The crying part? Stop that.
Oh well, don’t forget, you get the combat pay bonus of $1000 for every two hours of lost sleep on this. So it’s not a total loss.