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2 thoughts on “Perfectionism”
I have grappled with perfectionism my whole life. It has taken many shitty professional situations and a lot of work on myself to get to the point where I’m ok with not doing things just so. What I have discovered is for me, perfectionism was a means of control. When I worked so hard to get things lined up perfectly, I felt in control and I liked that feeling. So I continued to drive myself into the ground spending so much time working to be the perfect teacher. I finally couldn’t do it anymore and it all came to a head. With therapy and adopting a new outlook on life, I was finally able to sever the cord that tied who I am as a teacher to part of my identity. Discovering the Invisibles was the point culminant on the new me. The Invisibles allow me to still love teaching while not working myself to the bone. This then allows me to have a life outside of school, which I’m so happy about.
I’m glad and I agree that the Invisibles can do this for a teacher. I know that my own perfectionism has deeper roots in needing approval of others, and so for most of my career I put up w snotty kids, snotty admins and snotty parents.
So many ways to react to snot! If we let them snot all over us, we lose. If we resist and try to fight them w what the research actually says, they snot on us and we lose again. Reading what you wrote above Dana makes me think that the best reaction to snot is to close the door and teach as we wish. I mean, those folks in the AES Office of Learning certainly don’t have firing power. And if the kids are happy which they are, we really can just ignore the snot showers.
BTW, I never told you how glad I am that you got my 6th graders, those inventors of the Invisibles. But now they go to the high school. Great!